When we were on vacation, I bought this cup for PB because it was such a perfect cup.. and describe my almost perfect man. In any relationship, there are the ups and downs.. and of course, we have our fair share of tiff and disagreement. For those who say they never had a tiff or were upset with each other must either be lying.. or still in their first stage of their relationship - you know the “honeymoon” period.

Mr Almost Perfect of mine, does just about everything.. although some of the things.. he is not too keen in doing. But he cooks for chloe and he makes my breakfast and does laundry .. and vacuum the floor and scrub the tub for chloe when she takes a bath everyday. He also gets my medication and place them in the pouch for me. .and test out my new blood sugar machine as well. He loves his games and toys but tries to spend time with me.. by watching shows with me.. even though i know his heart is at the computer desk - thinking of his game there. For those who knows us, you would know that we own our own business.. and the brat doesn’t sleep .. so the only time he can play is late at nite.. and he has to split his time between doing housework, spend time with yours truly and then he can game.

I can’t ask for more nor can I complain.. even though there are times.. i do but overall, our relationship is pretty much on the same pace right now.. and we’ve come a long way - i think anyways.. but the fact that he knows that women are crazy at times.. and ignores it .. when i go crazy.. i think that was the winning combination/solution to our relationship.

So PB’s first cousin got married a few days ago. When i first met them.. they were still kids in school. But i’ll have to say .. the twins are awesome kids.. and grew up to be awesome adults. I bet her parents are proud of her.. and when the pastor asked “who gives her hand in marriage” - her father replied, ” her mother and I” .. I wanna cry..!! I love weddings.. donch you ..??

So we have great plans - or so we thought - our plans included many activities and lots of sightseeing. It even involved getting some horse supplements on the way home. But lo and behold, THE KID DONCH WANNA WALK! I never thought this was gonna happen to us - some other kids but never us .. of course, but expect the unexpected. Moment of truth and revelation time! THE KID DONCH WANNA WALK !

There was so much to see at the Halifax Waterfront during the summer but the kid continued whining and wanted to be carried. It was too hot !! the wind was too cold!!! How long more do we have to walk - she would continue asking. Is it normal..??? of course it is..!! she is afterall a kid. I just burst your bubbles didn’t i ..?? about going on vacation with your 5.5 yrs old.. or even 6 yrs old. I bet when she is 9 .. we might still have the same problems. But nevermind, this time we were ill-prepared.. but the next trip.. we have a plan.. muahahahhaha!!!!

No .. no..!! we are not leaving her behind .. that’s for sure.. i can’t lived without her - and she won’t let us go .. that’s for sure. I would be too sad.. to even enjoy my vacation. So what is my plans..??

I am getting a stroller or a wagon with us for the vacation ..!!!! yes.. and if she whines about walking .. we are gonna put her in there.. with lots of sunscreen.. so that we can enjoy our walk.. and sightseeing.

And to make sure.. that there is a play place for her to spend time at .. so that she can get some exercise as well.. and be happy to explore and play with other kids.

She’s happy now.. and so will we .. you think..?? i think it might go better than our last trip. One can always plan .. and hope for the best eh..?? but this time.. i have to remember to bring our sunscreen.

Hi, everyone - my name is MB and I’m a helicopter mom - hahahha!!! funny ..?? i’m sure some of you are now wondering if you are a helicopter mom as well right ..?? Hahha!! fear not.. because as parents - it is our duty to be able to see the truth and admit that this is what we are. Unlike our forefathers, we never admits when they are obviously wrong or made the wrong decision - modern parenting is liberal. We like to be in a learning process and who isn’t right .. ?? in everything we do .. on a daily basis.

I met a parent in Blue Cross North Carolina, who claimed and self professes that she loves her kids with her life and would never do anything wrong by her kids or by anyone. Now when you hear someone talk this way, I would steer clear of this person - hahahha!!! self-righteousness does not sit well with me .. when it comes to parenting.

Anyhow, lets come back to me.. being a helicopter mom. Yes - I have to admit that .. and yes.. i hover over my lil’ brat every chance i get. And even though i want her to learn to be independent - i still send Kate with her to the playground and to the summer camp. Is it wrong to be a helicopter mom..??? like all parents and parenting - in my humble opinion .. no one is right or wrong and nothing is by the book. Certain methods works for one parent but not for another - certain child does good by a certain way and others by another. But having said all the above, a helicopter mom like myself needs to be careful what message i’m sending to my child.

Experts claimed that this trend of hyper-parenting does not go well with the current trend. And over the last 20 yrs or so hyper-parenting is the norm here in the West but it is the same as in the East. I’ve friends who are exactly like myself - so donch beat yourself up if you identify with me.

Why the birth of the bubble..?? I think it’s because we grew up in the era of the more relaxed parenting or rather our parents were very busy at work and trying to put food on the dinner table. So we were left to our own devices and we were told to play outside until the sky turns dark. We pretty much invented our own games and work things out ourselves with our peers, there were no intervention like the ones we do for our kids now.

By the 90s, families are getting smaller - ppl don’t have as many kids like our parents or even forefathers did. They had more money to spend on toys for their kids and with more documented kidnapping and child abuse, there came the era of stay at home moms. Working moms competing with the stay at home moms for the perfect formula to a brighter kid and greater future for our kids.

It is definitely easy to say .. that mothers or parenting should be a relaxing one and when they are ready to do it.. they would. Do I want to be the kind of parent who bragged about my kid and ignore bad behavior because of my hyper-parenting? Bursting the bubbles is hard - but letting go a bit at a time - I can do it. Giving my brat some basis rules and then allowing her to explore, have fun and be herself is important. Although, my kid would never go to the store alone at 5.5 yrs old - I think that is pretty alright.

As cute as she may be .. and as much as we love her .. the kid wouldn’t sleep at nite .. and most times.. we would end up getting really frustrated… as if she was testing our patience .. and pushing us to our limit.

She is extremely smart.. and extremely sensible in a lot of things.. but the kid wouldn’t sleep. She is aware of the consequences.. if she doesn’t get enough rest.. and that we would not let her go swimming the next day if she doesn’t get enough rest .. yet she refuses to sleep at a reasonable time.

We are not even asking the brat to sleep at 7.30pm.. like the neighbour’s kids .. nor at 8.30pm.. or even 9.30pm since we only get home at 9.30pm most days. 10.30pm is reasonable.. it gives us enough time.. to read to her.. watch a little show with her.. and then she sleeps..so that we can get some housework done .. or cook for her lunch for the next day - since she is such a fussy eater. But nope.. the kid wouldn’t sleep.

So at 11.30pm .. i’ll be looking like that.. yes.. i kid you not. But nevermind.. i tell myself.. we asked her to go pee again.. and give her more water.. and carry her from the bathroom to the tv room again.. and cajole her to bed again … but nope.. the kid wouldn’t sleep.

So by 12.30am.. she thinks she is cute.. we think she is not.. and ready to blow up.. and ready to start screaming at her.. but hate to do it.. because that is not good parenting right..?? so we reason with her.. and tell her that we are not letting Kate come babysit her the next day.. and all hell breaks lose because she starts wailing her lungs out. So i put on my sweater.. and tell her.. i’m leaving .. and more wailing.. and then she promises to sleep.. and she cleans up her tears.. and talk a little more.. and wants more hugs and kisses.. and then she falls asleep at 1.45am. So yes.. as much as we loved the brat .. with all our heart and ever breathe we take.. the kid wouldn’t sleep. Pray tell what can we do… and if you think we haven’t tried everything.. than you are wrong.. we’ve been trying for 5.5yrs.. and she just wouldn’t sleep at nite.. when we are around.

So we headed to the discovery center in Halifax on Barrington Street, the second day in the city. It wasn’t hard to locate the place.. but parking sure suxs..! and darn expensive..!!!! But we’ve heard so many good things .. about the Discovery Center.. so how can we deprived our brat of it right..?? it is a non - profit organization.. so yes.. even though it was ex.. it was alright lah. Cannot right.. be so stingy.. Plus it’s not like one needs to have mesothelioma before you can afford to go there.

Chloe trying out a baby dino nest?

The magic box .. for those who had been wondering how your favorite magician does it.

Chloe took a little coaxing before she would go in to the magic box.

A mini model of the McKay/Macdonald bridge and Chloe going up on it.. to see how it feels up on the bridge that she had traveled on in a car many times.

Magic balls that float by itself.

Here’s Chloe testing them out herself.

A Plasma Ball

Chloe loves this - wished we had a sandbox for her… when she was younger but we spend so much time in the store.. so we didn’t bother.

Blowing big bubbles here - we had a good time and we bought some glowing stars as well as some rocks that Chloe wanted which was a buck each but like i said before, it is a non profit organization, so we don’t mind paying for it.

We stayed at Uncle Budd’s for the first nite .. when we were on our vacation. As usual Uncle Budd was very nice and we even met his friend .. and am very happy for him. This trip Chloe just took to Uncle Budd and his friend immediately - unlike the last time we were there, she woke up at 4am.. and wanted to go home.. and crying and whining and the works. As you can see, she was showing Uncle Budd how to work her DS. We didn’t stay for another nite because we wanted to be able to get a better night sleep with internet access and we had promised Chloe a hotel stay for her vacation. But it was definitely a nice visit.. and staying at Uncle Budd’s saved us a lot of money .. because that weekend was when Sir Paul McCartney was playing in Halifax’s commons.

So we are back from our vacation, a short one .. but that was all the time we could afford. We didn’t go very far.. but we did a lot .. more than we had for the last 5 yrs. With your own businesses and a child.. and years of ex-employees that had the “me first” attitude.. there was just no way to go anywheres. This year, we had Katelynn who double up as a part time employee at the store.. and looked after the store.. while we were gone. Yes, she followed instructions to the tee .. and we had no problems with her manning the store.. for she is trustworthy. On top of it.. we had our good friend, Gary come see look.. and help Kate when it was busy - during the days we were gone. Grateful for good friends.. and finally a good employee - we are going for another short break in August before the summer ends. So while PB bought some golf training aids for himself, he bought me this handmade necklace. Love it..!! and he insisted on paying for it.. so i’m happy.

Our next stop was the wild life park - at Upper Clements about another 30mins from Digby. But I have to tell you .. it is a very small park and we took only an hour - walking really slowly and we got thru’ the entire park. There was a lot to see .. for Chloe.. but for me.. it was so-so… afterall, i had been to so many already from different places.

The trail begins here.. the walk was definitely good for me.. but after the walk around the wildlife park.. my tummy hurt in the evening. Hahahha!!! But i know it will get better as the days goes by.

They do have signs up.. but the only thing the irks me a lot is there is no safe station where there should be ppl to help in case of an injury or someone fainted. You all know how huge some of our Canadians are here eh.

A very calm eagle as you can see here. It did not move nor fly anywheres.. but can’t blame it eh.. no space to fly.. the cage was really small.

A closer look at the eagle - A bald eagle - anything but bald as you can see .. muahahhaha!!

We started our vacation with very good weather.. and we woke up early enough.. and headed out before noon. Our first stop was Digby - a town 45 mins away from us.. and it is a very beautiful place as you can see. The ocean, boats and whale watching and many eateries for seafood - known for its famous scallops. No we didn’t have scallops.. but food was good.. and the portion were huge. It was a really good start albeit the fact that PB had a bad tummy last nite.. and this morning.. when we started off.

After lunch, we took a short walk around town.. and had some ice cream.. before we headed to our next stop.. the zoo..!!! I had rum and raisin ice cream.. the first.. after so many years. And no they donch have rum and raisins here.

So I went for a haircut with a new hair stylist because the one I go to .. is too busy to return my call. Yes.. i had been trying to get ahold of her.. but nope.. no luck for more than a month. So finally, I got myself an appt with another hairstylist in town. She did a great job .. and i really like her. But was amused and amazed … when she asked me.. if everyone in Singapore was poor. I donch know how i should have reacted..?? But that probably explains why when i first came to Canada, the employees we had said stuff like ” I was rescued from poverty” muahahhahaha!!!! I guess they really must think we lived in attap houses. For those who are not aware of this.. the place I am living in .. is prolly like the 80s in Singapore. We have no high rise here.. like in Asia. The tallest building here is 5 - storey tall - of course in the city about 4 hrs they have taller ones.. but not as tall as the ones back home.

Is it ignorance..?? or what..?? am i offended..?? nah.. but quite amused lor .. truth be told.. that the ppl in Canada.. donch know where Singapore is.. nor know that we are the 5th richest country in the world.. and our government has a $170.3billion in reserve. Singapore is highly cosmopolitan and diverse with Chinese people forming an ethnic majority with large populations of Malay, Indian and other people. Well, there you have it.. so if anyone ask me.. i’ll show them this post.. muahahahhaha!!! very amusing eh - Canadians we are talking about here.

For those who are not aware of this, I was approached by immigration lawyers about a year ago to share my experiences with others like myself who had fallen in love with someone other than your own country or those thinking of migrating to Canada. Am I compensated for it..?? nope.. but i feel good helping others out.. and if you know me .. you would know that I’m that kind of person. But for those “idiots” out there.. i have no patients with them nor do I want to associate myself with them. My philosophy in life is .. why bother or waste time on non-important stuff and “A-holes”.

Ok.. lets get back to the immigration stuff. Most ppl asked me .. how I made the decision .. and what made me decide to uproot - afterall, we all know that Singapore is a place with everything and anything. Is love really blind..?? Is love enough to sustain a long lasting relationship…??? Migrating is no laughing matter, nor was it an easy decision to stay and not go back home, like buying some swing sets. I have been in Canada.. for almost 10 yrs now .. and before coming to Canada.. I was in a 6 yrs long distance relationship with my spouse.

I cannot speak for other men in Canada.. but my spouse is a pretty simple and straightforward person.. who doesn’t believe in even telling white lies. Having said that.. it’s not like he fights with me .. all the time.. just to get his point across but he rather .. not fight.. and let me go on a rant.. every now and then.. if i so wish to. As the years went by .. it gets a little harder.. because i do miss home.. and i do miss the food from home. But had i not come.. i wouldn’t have such a beautiful daughter.. who is my greatest accomplishment.

So do you listen to your heart or your head..??? I have no regrets .. and if i had to turn the clock back.. i would rather had him come to Singapore.. but love is a strange thing eh..?? so if you are thinking of migrating.. you will have to weigh your pros and cons.. but make sure that whatever you do, you have to be very sure.. the person you are gonna be with .. is not psycho or a serial killer.. or a woman beater.. or will mentally torture you. Harsh as i may sound, it is for your own safety.

As Chloe grows older day by day, we also learn different things as parents. But like all new parents - we consider ourselves new .. because she is our only child .. and we never had the experience nor expertise .. in bringing up another kid.. nor were educated for it - it is amazing how much we learn from this child of ours.. and how much we want to better ourselves to teach her the best and the right thing.

As awesome as any kid can be.. i’m sure - parents do not want to admit that their kid can turn into a brat just overnite.. and our chloe can be.. if she wants to be. But like any kid who is 5.5yrs old, one need to realise.. that it is all a learning experience for her too. A child do not know how to express themselves appropriately, they only know how to show how they are feeling truthfully albeit it may not be the best way or the correct way. That’s why God created parents donch you think..??

Being the only child can sometimes be hard because she is so protected - hell we even send her to day camp with her babysitter. So if she was a sore loser, that can be understandable.. but that does not mean that it should carry on. So when Chloe only wanted to win in everything whether a game with the sitter or a game with a friend who was visiting, we told her that she cannot be a sore loser. In which her respond was .. ” WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA …!!!! Jenny said i was a sore loser too..!!!”

Alrighty..!!! so we know we had to steer my kid into the right direction and the right response from us is very important at this stage. I bet many of you know where i’m coming from eh and in fact asked yourselves .. what demon actually possessed your kid .. at that moment.. right..?? hahhahahaha!!! fear not..!! for experts said it is normal behavior for a child as young as ours.

So what do you do..?? you asked yourself..?? when you child have an outburst or blow up..?? steer clear your clear of competitive situation..?? or give your child a treat.. and distract them..?? Banning games or distracting them or not encouraging competition are all not good ideas - our job as parents is to teach them to express respectfully and the younger you start, the better it is. It is recommended that you empathise and ask if they need an alone time to cry and to cool off, talk to them about a more appropriate way to express themselves. Allowing both kids to win by yelling “Tie!” is also another alternative and explaining to your kid that both can win even if they come in second and their friend first. All the positive re-enforcement .. eh..?? Focus on pointing out the good stuff, like “that was a nice move!” or “good try!” and always make sure that you tell your kid .. having a good time and good sportmanship is more important than winning .. and by the time they are older.. they will know that winning feels good.. but even if you donch win, it’s alright..! they had fun.. and that’s what matters most. I hope my experience help others…. therefore i’m penning it down. Good luck..!!! and no… your kid is not evil..! hahhahahaha!!!

I received this message on my expat blog profile, but helen, i’m unable to reply because you have not email address. You can write to me.. on my contact on this blog, else you can leave a comment here. Migrating is a huge thing, I’ve been thru’ it. .and I want to help as much as possible. I’m no expert.. but can only share my experiences with others. For those who are thinking of migrating.. feel free to ask me any questions. So Helen .. contact me.. because you need to.. ! I usually do not post your questions here.. but since you are 3 months pregnant.. it’s important.. that we speak quickly.

Hi, I am a Singaporean, applying for Canada immigration now. Just got the medical exam done. I am currently 3 months pregnant. Can you advise me on whether go Canada and deliver, or deliver in Singapore then go Canada? What are the charges if I deliver in Canada? Thanks.
by Helen on 01/07/2009 at 21:10:42